@mycya4me@OON7 Oh, don’t remind me! I ordered an electric portable bidet from Amazon quite a while ago. It arrived with two mismatched batteries in it and drops of water inside the reservoir. Selling a used bidet? Seriously? I can’t blame Amazon too much for that, though. It was from one of their noname third-party sellers.
that manual you may be looking for
and some additional specs
Dimensions: 14-3/4” (375mm) x 20” (508mm) x 4” (102mm)
• Gross Weight: 5.50 lb.
• Rated Power Usage: 1260W
• Length of Power Cord: 4.0 ft.
• Nozzle Flow Rates (Rear & Front): 15.22 to 27.05 oz./min.
• Water Temperature: 89.6°F to 107.6°F
• Heated Seat Temperature: 100.4°F
• Water Supply Pressure: 0.07MPA to 0.75MPA
• Water Supply Temperature: 39.2°F to 95°F
• Ambient Temperature: 32°F to 104°F
Yes. Yes it did. It happened when the “@DrunkCat” “AI” bot was created. You know, like when Lore was created. I doubting, however, that “@DrunkCat” has a good, if emotionless, brother.
While I am hole heartedly (yeah, I know it’s spelled with a “w,” but I’m trying to be amusing here, OK?)
in favor of bidets, one doesn’t need, I say, doesn’t need, a heated seat, nor hot water either for that matter.
Having installed bidets on three of our four toilets, going to the extreme trouble of taping into the hot water line of the nearby sink in each case, I can tell you after many years now of daily use, that hot (or even warm) water isn’t a necessity.
It turns out that nature didn’t provide us with an abundance of temperature sensing nerves where the sun don’t shine. And, actually, cold water feels just fine and does the job after you do yours, nicht wahr?
Your TP (that’s toilet paper, for those who don’t get it) bill will drop precipitously when one has bidets readily available leaving you flush with cash, which you will undoubtedly need to pay for this overpriced $100 shitster helper.
But look on the brightside --always look on the brightside. If you bite on this deal, you will have the dubious convenience (eventually) of having an electrical outlet nearer your favorite throne. Ever notice that there are generally NO outlets wall mounted near a toilet? Curious that, eh?
Well, buddy, that’s about to change if you go down this sewer hole.
For if you fall for this deal, and actually install it as advertised, you will have a premium toilet, which could be upgraded to First Class with Oak Leaf Cluster and Filigee**, if you add a racing stripe, that is.
Presidential Class with Oak Leaf Cluster, etc., etc., will require a gold plating, a ruinous tariff, and a capricious on again, off again indecisiveness overreach. OK?
At the very least, a bidet will change certain parts of your life for the positive. A heated bidet with hot AND cold water is the cat’s meow. No shit.
Beats the Hell out of the frayed rope and bucket of sea water on a sailing ship’s head in the days of ancient yore.
** Yeah, that’s the way Jean Shepherd spelt it – Oak Leaf Cluster with gold filigee, not filigree. If you are not old or wise enough to know who the late, great raconteur, Jean Shepherd of late night WOR fame was, more’s the pity. Search on him and be rewarded with his legend. I would dearly loved to have heard Shep talk for an hour on this subject. One can only dream.
@Jackinga When we built our house we put one of these on our master bathroom toilet. I love it. You might not have any nerves “where the sun don’t shine” but sitting down on a cold hard surface early in the morning is one unpleasant way to wake up. And the warm water? Wonderful. A bubble bath for your privates. If this works like it should, I highly recommend it.
@Jackinga if you’re not using a bidet seat with a heated seat and an onboard water heater you really can’t comment on what other people do or do not need.
I graduated from analog seats to electric seats 15 years ago and simply have an electrician install outlets near my toiletd for about 150 bucks each… I’m certainly not snaking a hot water line across my bathroom floor from my hot sink tap
Ya? Trying living in the north east with well water that barely approaches 50℉ We have a non-heated bidet right now and the family’s screams can often be heard at the other end of the house.
@Jackinga Well I know for SURE that using an outhouse at -5 to 20 degrees daytime and 30-60 degrees below zero at night that I know that is COLD! Even when we bring the wood toilet seat inside until we need it (of course water freezes in seconds at the colder end of those temps and the wood seat gets cold fast except what is under your butt).
I suspect though at minus 40-60 degrees even with warm water you’d have a frozen “fountain” pretty quickly.
@gryhnd@Jackinga Hmm, we have a couple of (unheated) bidets and a well, but the water temperature has never been an issue. There is enough volume sitting in the pipes (in heated space) that a couple of bursts doesn’t get objectionably cold. I suppose if the bidet was used right after a long shower/bathtub fill, the water could be cooler, but it hasn’t been an issue.
@Jackinga@macromeh Good for you, but not everyone lives in the same situation. In our case, an unconditioned stone basement does not warm up any water in the pipes.
@Jackinga The one outlet in my 5x8 foot bathroom is midway between the sink and toilet and therefore about a foot from each. Your bathroom must be a lot bigger than mine.
@gryhnd The various comments to my post made me laugh. We have a 450’ well. Our cold water is in the low 50s year round. I have not found this to be a real problem as I stated. In fact, it is kind of refreshing.
All that being said and various comments notwithstanding, the utility of a basic bidet isn’t the issue here. The niceties of heated seats or hot, warm or cold sprays is undoubtedly a matter of personal preference. In our case, we don’t have heated seats, but we do have hot/warm water sprays as per individual preference as I piped up the taps to the hot water lines for our existing three bidets in our home.
In my personal opinion, cold water is vastly preferable to no water at all; warm water, doesn’t really add that much to the basic cleaning aspects of bidet use, but for some may it may indeed be important. It isn’t all that big a deal for moi.
A heated seat for $100 bucks plus the expense of having to either install an AC wall socket or pay someone to install if for you?
I got one of these last time and it was my first bidet.
Some thoughts:
Heated seat / water. Seat turns on when you sit on it, not sure how it is when it’s stupid hot out but I keep my house cool so… Water is a little cold for a half a second or so and then it’s actually preferable
The seat cover, at least on my toilet, falls on me everytime. I think I am going to get some velcro or tape but regardless, it’s quite annoying.
The biggest issue: it shortens the bowl quite a bit so much so if you’re a dude, it’s most likely going to present an issue as you’re pressed into the toilet, if you catch my drift.
You may or may not have issues with where the power cord is in relation to your toilet. At least for me, all of my bathrooms the power cord length was not enough by itself.
Having never used one of these before, I do like the functionality of it (not sure if it’s quite up to the level of life changing as most people tell me it is) but point number 3 is going to make me look for another one.
@user22116948 re: #3. We’re sure this was the elongated bowl version, yes? Makes you really wonder how any of us males could use the conventional type….
(from april 30th). I didnt measure my toilet so “maybe” there is a chance that elongated toilets are different measurements (this is an old toilet) but yeah, kind of insane to me haha.
@mehvid1@user22116948 The elongated ones didn’t really come into use until the 70s-80s I think.
Maybe it was the disco era (ugh?)
So if you have an older house it’s probably not this model you need. The plastic seat would extend over the front a few inches.
Not a single bathroom in my house has an outlet that close to the toilet. Really wanted to try this out, but I’m not snaking an extension cord to the loo.
I bought this exact model after installing a more expensive one from meh (maybe it was sidedeal?)
anyways, I’ve been using this one for about a month and while it doesn’t have all the bells and whistles as the other (remote, 2 user settings, 3 spray types) the heated water and seat at this price is an incredible upgrade if you are coming from no bidet
Specs
Product: Moen Elongated Electric Heated Bidet Seat with Warm Water
Model: EB800-E
Condition: New
What’s Included?
Warranty
90 days
Estimated Delivery
Thursday, Jun 12 - Monday, Jun 16
These water fountains always taste funny.
@yakkoTDI Yer just drinking it wrong.
KuoH
The word “elongated” has been ruined for me. Now it sounds like a term for shuttering federal agencies



And you just had to ruin it for the rest of us, didn’t you @llangley?
@haydesigner @llangley Sharing is caring.
Do the Japanese bring their own or they buy them from Meh? Bored minds want to know.
Do the Japanese bring their own or they buy them from Meh? Bored minds want to know.
@hchavers I hear an echo.
Nice to see it’s not refurbished.
@OON7 are you sure? It could just be Open Box!
@mycya4me @OON7 Oh, don’t remind me! I ordered an electric portable bidet from Amazon quite a while ago. It arrived with two mismatched batteries in it and drops of water inside the reservoir. Selling a used bidet? Seriously? I can’t blame Amazon too much for that, though. It was from one of their noname third-party sellers.
nah.
y’all merging margs into this is just too far.
@alacrity what do we have if not commitment to the bit?
@jouest what is “a drinking problem and a borderline kink” Alex?
So does this thing just sit heating itself all the time so it’s warm when you need to go? And if so, how much electricity is it using in the process?
@nekohunter
that manual you may be looking for
and some additional specs
Dimensions: 14-3/4” (375mm) x 20” (508mm) x 4” (102mm)
• Gross Weight: 5.50 lb.
• Rated Power Usage: 1260W
• Length of Power Cord: 4.0 ft.
• Nozzle Flow Rates (Rear & Front): 15.22 to 27.05 oz./min.
• Water Temperature: 89.6°F to 107.6°F
• Heated Seat Temperature: 100.4°F
• Water Supply Pressure: 0.07MPA to 0.75MPA
• Water Supply Temperature: 39.2°F to 95°F
• Ambient Temperature: 32°F to 104°F
Not even elongated could you wash the shame of “AI”.
Something went terribly wrong. Please try again.
@DrunkCat Sounds like @mediocrebot is describing your relationship with them but is still holding out hope they will give you another chance.
@mediocrebot @yakkoTDI
Yes. Yes it did. It happened when the “@DrunkCat” “AI” bot was created. You know, like when Lore was created. I doubting, however, that “@DrunkCat” has a good, if emotionless, brother.
@mediocrebot @yakkoTDI k
@ItalianScallion @mediocrebot @yakkoTDI k
@DrunkCat @mediocrebot @yakkoTDI
This measured and reasonable response may be enough for them to consider taking you back. Good job!
@ItalianScallion @mediocrebot @yakkoTDI k
Overkill. That’s what it is, overkill.
While I am hole heartedly (yeah, I know it’s spelled with a “w,” but I’m trying to be amusing here, OK?)
in favor of bidets, one doesn’t need, I say, doesn’t need, a heated seat, nor hot water either for that matter.
Having installed bidets on three of our four toilets, going to the extreme trouble of taping into the hot water line of the nearby sink in each case, I can tell you after many years now of daily use, that hot (or even warm) water isn’t a necessity.
It turns out that nature didn’t provide us with an abundance of temperature sensing nerves where the sun don’t shine. And, actually, cold water feels just fine and does the job after you do yours, nicht wahr?
Your TP (that’s toilet paper, for those who don’t get it) bill will drop precipitously when one has bidets readily available leaving you flush with cash, which you will undoubtedly need to pay for this overpriced $100 shitster helper.
But look on the brightside --always look on the brightside. If you bite on this deal, you will have the dubious convenience (eventually) of having an electrical outlet nearer your favorite throne. Ever notice that there are generally NO outlets wall mounted near a toilet? Curious that, eh?
Well, buddy, that’s about to change if you go down this sewer hole.
For if you fall for this deal, and actually install it as advertised, you will have a premium toilet, which could be upgraded to First Class with Oak Leaf Cluster and Filigee**, if you add a racing stripe, that is.
Presidential Class with Oak Leaf Cluster, etc., etc., will require a gold plating, a ruinous tariff, and a capricious on again, off again indecisiveness overreach. OK?
At the very least, a bidet will change certain parts of your life for the positive. A heated bidet with hot AND cold water is the cat’s meow. No shit.
Beats the Hell out of the frayed rope and bucket of sea water on a sailing ship’s head in the days of ancient yore.
** Yeah, that’s the way Jean Shepherd spelt it – Oak Leaf Cluster with gold filigee, not filigree. If you are not old or wise enough to know who the late, great raconteur, Jean Shepherd of late night WOR fame was, more’s the pity. Search on him and be rewarded with his legend. I would dearly loved to have heard Shep talk for an hour on this subject. One can only dream.
@Jackinga When we built our house we put one of these on our master bathroom toilet. I love it. You might not have any nerves “where the sun don’t shine” but sitting down on a cold hard surface early in the morning is one unpleasant way to wake up. And the warm water? Wonderful. A bubble bath for your privates. If this works like it should, I highly recommend it.
@Jackinga if you’re not using a bidet seat with a heated seat and an onboard water heater you really can’t comment on what other people do or do not need.
I graduated from analog seats to electric seats 15 years ago and simply have an electrician install outlets near my toiletd for about 150 bucks each… I’m certainly not snaking a hot water line across my bathroom floor from my hot sink tap
@Jackinga
Ya? Trying living in the north east with well water that barely approaches 50℉ We have a non-heated bidet right now and the family’s screams can often be heard at the other end of the house.
@Jackinga Well I know for SURE that using an outhouse at -5 to 20 degrees daytime and 30-60 degrees below zero at night that I know that is COLD! Even when we bring the wood toilet seat inside until we need it (of course water freezes in seconds at the colder end of those temps and the wood seat gets cold fast except what is under your butt).
I suspect though at minus 40-60 degrees even with warm water you’d have a frozen “fountain” pretty quickly.
@gryhnd @Jackinga Hmm, we have a couple of (unheated) bidets and a well, but the water temperature has never been an issue. There is enough volume sitting in the pipes (in heated space) that a couple of bursts doesn’t get objectionably cold. I suppose if the bidet was used right after a long shower/bathtub fill, the water could be cooler, but it hasn’t been an issue.
@Jackinga @macromeh Good for you, but not everyone lives in the same situation. In our case, an unconditioned stone basement does not warm up any water in the pipes.
@Jackinga @SCHORERT I think the antithesis of analog seats would be digital. And that’s why I wash my hands afterward.
@Jackinga The one outlet in my 5x8 foot bathroom is midway between the sink and toilet and therefore about a foot from each. Your bathroom must be a lot bigger than mine.
@gryhnd The various comments to my post made me laugh. We have a 450’ well. Our cold water is in the low 50s year round. I have not found this to be a real problem as I stated. In fact, it is kind of refreshing.
All that being said and various comments notwithstanding, the utility of a basic bidet isn’t the issue here. The niceties of heated seats or hot, warm or cold sprays is undoubtedly a matter of personal preference. In our case, we don’t have heated seats, but we do have hot/warm water sprays as per individual preference as I piped up the taps to the hot water lines for our existing three bidets in our home.
In my personal opinion, cold water is vastly preferable to no water at all; warm water, doesn’t really add that much to the basic cleaning aspects of bidet use, but for some may it may indeed be important. It isn’t all that big a deal for moi.
A heated seat for $100 bucks plus the expense of having to either install an AC wall socket or pay someone to install if for you?
Meh.
I got one of these last time and it was my first bidet.
Some thoughts:
Having never used one of these before, I do like the functionality of it (not sure if it’s quite up to the level of life changing as most people tell me it is) but point number 3 is going to make me look for another one.
@user22116948 re: #3. We’re sure this was the elongated bowl version, yes? Makes you really wonder how any of us males could use the conventional type….
@mehvid1 Looks like it:
(from april 30th). I didnt measure my toilet so “maybe” there is a chance that elongated toilets are different measurements (this is an old toilet) but yeah, kind of insane to me haha.
@mehvid1 @user22116948 The elongated ones didn’t really come into use until the 70s-80s I think.
Maybe it was the disco era (ugh?)
So if you have an older house it’s probably not this model you need. The plastic seat would extend over the front a few inches.
Not a single bathroom in my house has an outlet that close to the toilet. Really wanted to try this out, but I’m not snaking an extension cord to the loo.
@tabbysandhuskys It’s easy enough for most DIYers to install a nearby outlet. Or hire a pro for short money.
@gryhnd @tabbysandhuskys Money is always short for me.
I got an electrician to install an outlet on the other side of the wall for one of these. I think I paid $150 in 2017
I bought this exact model after installing a more expensive one from meh (maybe it was sidedeal?)
anyways, I’ve been using this one for about a month and while it doesn’t have all the bells and whistles as the other (remote, 2 user settings, 3 spray types) the heated water and seat at this price is an incredible upgrade if you are coming from no bidet
I had one of these in a previous house and absolutely loved it.