Seasonal Aches

Section 2: Multiple Choice

1. It is a cold winter day, and your legs feel sore. Why?

A. You bundled up and went for a long jog.
B. You were out walking, slipped on some ice and fell.
C. You were out walking, slipped on some ice, and caught yourself, only to pull something in your contortions to keep upright.
D. You haven’t been walking or running or moving. Like, at all. For days.

2. It is a cold winter day, and your arms feel sore. Why?

A. To avoid cabin fever, you finally invested in a gym membership, and whoa! You are seeing some major gains! Seriously, what are you benching these days? It’s impressive, but there’s no getting around it: sometimes getting ripped means a little bit of arm pain.
B. While hunkered down inside, you’ve undertaken some sort of redecorating project, and moving all that furniture around? It’s straining your arm muscles.
C. You have just put up or put away your holiday decorations, and boy, it seems like those boxes get heavier every year.
D. You’ve been playing GTA for somewhere between six straight hours and three straight days, and you didn’t realize how tense your arms have been that whole time.

3. It is a cold winter day, and your neck feels sore. Why?

A. Poor driving conditions. Low visibility. This means you spend your entire commute tensely leaning forward.
B. You just watched all the Mission Impossible movies straight through, laying on your side on the couch, with only a little pillow for support.
C. You slept weird.
D. The thing from question one? About slipping on the ice, catching yourself, and still tweaking something? That again, but in your neck this time as well as your legs.

4. It is a cold winter day, and your back feels sore. Why?

A. You spent the day chopping wood and piling it on the wood pile for your fireplace, and you may have, once or twice, lifted with your back instead of your legs.
B. You just shoveled snow for the third time this week.
C. You stood over a pot of stew for an hour or two, your posture slightly hunched without realizing it.
D. While binge-watching baking shows on a day when the high was in single digits and/or had a negative sign in front of it, you started to get a headache, at which point you realized that you had consumed roughly three ounces of water since waking ten hours earlier. You reached for your water cup maybe a little too quickly and felt something pull.

KEY:
If you answered A, B, C, or D on questions 1, 2, 3, or 4, you might consider investing in a percussion massager.