Today's SideDealYour-Choice: Hot Wheels or Barbie Bundle Playsets
Our Take
- Barbie playset includes four dolls and a variety of hospital accessories
- Hot Wheels playset includes 4 cars and a rad track
- Can you believe it? Actual toys you’ve heard of?! ON MEH?!
- Can they make a margarita: Unfortunately, Booze-Hound Barbie never made it to shelves
Mattel The Truth
We know, we know.
You’re all clamoring for more Hoverboard Heroes. We get it. People just can’t get enough of those things. They collect them, resell them on the secondary market, make thousands, et cetera, et cetera.
But alas. We hope you will settle for these lesser toy offerings: a Hot Wheels or Barbie playset.
Now, these sets are pretty big. You get either 4 Hot Wheels cars or 4 dolls (2 Barbies, 1 Ken, 1 Chelsea) and a variety of accessories/tracks. But let me tell you from experience: they’re actually even bigger. Because as soon as you get your kid some Hot Wheels or some Barbies, every person in your life who previously raised a kid who at one point loved either Hot Wheels or Barbies will hand down their hand-me-downs directly to you.
(This will be cool at first, but then quickly become overwhelming when you’ve got enough automobiles to populate a miniature metropolitan area, or an entire town’s worth of 11.5-inch-tall professional dolls.)
And now, both options have been made into major motion pictures. Well, actually that’s not entirely true. There is obviously the Barbie movie, but the upcoming John Cena vehicle (pun intended) is actually based on Matchbox. Which is sorta funny, right? Because as user ‘uncleawesome’ puts it on Reddit:
Hot wheels does the wild cars with big engines and silly proportions and Matchbox did realistic models.
In which case, wouldn’t Hot Wheels make the more exciting movie?
Unfortunately, neither can or will claim the title of best movie based on a toy, because that would be The Lego Movie.
Also unfortunately, neither of these products can be safely eaten. And we only mention that because many companies are releasing edible versions of their famous toys. Stuff like:
- Polly in my Poke
- Pickle Me Elmo
- Barbie-cued brisket
- GI Joe: a true American gyro
- Nintendo GamePoi
- Pho-nko Pop
- Pet Roq au Vin
- Rouxbix Cube
- Matchlox Cars
- American Grill Dolls
Okay, fine. These are pretty stupid puns. But the Hot Wheels and Barbie playsets? They’re not stupid at all. They’re fun toys that you’ve actually heard of. And we’re selling them.
Weird, right?
